Today’s story comes to you from my dad, followed up with something similar from me.
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For our honeymoon 50 years ago my wife and I went camping.
We didn’t have a lot of money so it was either that or go to my parents’ house.
We found a lovely spot in the Yorkshire Dales a couple of hours hike from where we parked the car. We had everything we needed which wasn’t much: a crappy orange A-frame tent, two potatoes, some water and a few other random things.
The tent was one of those special ones that you’re not allowed to touch from the inside when it rains. We tested that theory and yep, they were right – the water comes straight in. I’m not sure why they made them like that but I guess it was cool back then.
After doing some usual honeymoon things and eating a potato each we went to sleep under the rain in our little tent.
In the morning it had fortunately stopped raining, so I put on my shoes to go for a wee.
The first shoe went on ok but the other one seemed to have shrunk. It got a bit rained on so that was probably it.
I was determined to get it on though, so pushed and pushed and just about managed. While weeing it did feel a lot tighter than the other, and a little wet, but I guess that was to be expected.
When I got back to the tent and took it off I realised that it hadn’t actually shrunk.
Instead I found squashed slug-paste evenly spread around my toes, under my toenails and the bottom of my foot. I could tell it was a slug because there were little bits of its skin (if that’s the right word) wedged under my toenails.
What made this even better was realising that we only brought enough water to drink and there was no other source apart from the wet grass, so there I was for the next twenty minutes, scraping my feet on the grass and picking pits of slug out from under my toenails.
THE END.
I had a similar thing happen to me when I was a kid, although with me, I’d caught a bucket full of newt tadpoles which I kept in a fish tank in my bedroom.
One morning realised that they were no longer there.
Over the next few weeks I kept finding them. Some of them were squished and some were crispy, depending where they ended up, a couple of course in a shoe.
